How’s the baby’s rest? When do you sleep and how often do you wake up? The sleep of the little one seems a difficult issue, but it is not.
Baby sleep – One of the secrets to knowing your baby and also to help you reconcile sleep is by diving into your mysteries. Just as we adults have different ways of sleeping, babies also have their particularities, although there are common characteristics.
If you pay attention to your little boy’s sleep, you realize that he has a way of sleeping his own. It’s not just because you sleep often a day or not because every sleep lasts on average three hours, but because of what you do or stop doing while you sleep. Newborns have two phases: deep sleep and mild sleep.
Phase 1: deep sleep
In deep sleep, the baby has a regular and deep breath. Your posture in bed is full delivery, your body is relaxed and usually has open hands, quiet and smiling features. Waking you up at this stage of sleep is highly uncomfortable for the baby, who feels thrown out of bed.
Phase 2: light sleep
The light sleep phase is very easy to recognize, because although the eyes are closed, if you pay attention, it will detect rapid movements of the eyeball below the eyelids. Other signs that is at this stage are closed hands, the forehead frowning, moves a little and your breathing is irregular. If you need to wake him up to him when he’s in slight sleep, since the awakening will be less traumatic.
The question now is how to awaken the baby without crying. Do you realize how he shudders when he was woken up with noise? Therefore, it is advisable to use low voice and slow movements so that awakening is not a torment, but an instant as pleasurable as sleeping.
8 tips for creating a sleep routine for the baby
it seems mission impossible to create a sleep routine for your child, but with some strategies the task gets a lot easier. Check out our tips and leave the nights clear aside.
It’s 3:00 in the morning and your baby’s still awake, crying and you don’t know what else to do. Get him out of the crib and swing? Let him cry and just give that check to see that everything’s okay? Breastfeed? If you were able to visualize the scene, you’ve come to the right story. And just to comfort you: this situation is much more common than you think. So, calm down, take a deep breath and let’s go.
There is a profession that takes care of this, the children’s sleep coaches. And yes, they do exactly what they propose: they help parents put babies in a healthy sleep routine. With personalized plans, phone calls and overnight stays, they help and ensure quieter nights for families. For you to get an idea, in the United States this service can reach $3,500 on the plan that includes night visits and a year of support.
At this point you must be wondering how wonderful it would be to be to have a little country of these sleep coaches… To facilitate, we talked to experienced American professionals in the area and separate tips that, in addition to worth gold, really work to put the baby to sleep.
I wish they’d just put them in the crib or bed, with an appointment, so they could embark on a deep sleep until the next day. For some lucky parents, it’s simple that way. For much, however, making your child sleep requires training, persistence and patience. Not to mention the doubts that arise in the middle of the road. Who never wondered if you should wake up the baby because you were too asleep? Or almost went crazy, because he started waking up in the middle of the morning?
The worst part is that there is no recipe ready to solve gender impasses, just tips and reports of successful experiences that can be tested. Each situation must be evaluated individually. No wonder, a personalized service that is already popular in the United States has been gaining space in Brazil. It is the consultancy of maternal and child sleep, in which a specialist observes the routine, identifies the factors that prevent the child from sleeping, creates a sleep plan and guides parents, in person or via the Internet. “The whole family needs to be involved to know how to act, without confusing the child in the son reeducation process,” says neuropsychologist Deborah Moss. And she warns, “There’s no method that doesn’t involve a little crying, since we’re changing behavior.”
There is strength in numbers
According to Kim West, author of good night, sleep tight, the first step is to agree with her partner or partner. “I had clients who called me and said, ‘I need to do this without my husband knowing,'” she says. And that’s because they often don’t agree on continuing or stopping night breastfeeding, for example.
In some cases the mother even struggles to build a better routine, but the father can’t handle the night cries. “Whatever the reason, sleep training tends to be much less successful when one parent thinks that’s the other’s responsibility.” The tip is to maintain dialogue and reach an agreement so as not to explode with the crying during the early hours.
Routine is everything!
It may seem silly to do with a newborn, but according to coach Ingrid Prueher, it really works out. Experts advise you to start training after the baby’s 4 months, but in the meantime, you can create a healthy routine for bedtime from your child’s first day of life.
About 30 minutes to an hour before bedtime, lower the lights – this helps reduce cortisol levels. Then take a shower and the last meal of the day, followed by history or calm music. Do the ritual strictly every night, so it will be easier to grow it in the future.
Keep an eye out
Some parents keep their children up late at night to enjoy time together, but this can end the baby’s biological sleep routine. For a child from 3 to 6 months, the ideal time to sleep is very early – try not to pass 7:30 p.m.
One tip is to take into account that the baby has an interval of about 3 hours between his naps. For Ingrid, in these cases quality is better than quantity. “Your child will enjoy a lot more half an hour of reading or singing than spending hours with you while doing things in the house,” she advises.
Very calm at that time
Not every sound your baby makes at night means he needs a lap or fed. Sighs and groans may represent that he is just settling in his sleep – and messing with him can make the problem worse, especially if he wasn’t really awake. “After the baby goes after 4 months we usually teach parents to breathe and take it easy before they decide to enter the room and pick up the baby,” says Jennifer Waldburger co-founder of Sleepy Planet, a sleep training service in Los Angeles.
That is, before taking any action, take a look at the electronic nanny to make sure that your child is fine or still with his eyes open. If he is crying because of a real pain or discomfort, you will know by the volume of crying, which will increase rather than calm down.
Each one your way
Every baby is unique. And that means what worked with the neighbor’s son may not work out with yours. “For every child I work with, I take into account their temperament, the personalities of the parents and their lifestyle,” explains Brooke Nalle, founder of Sleepy on Hudson, a sleep training service in New York.
To get an idea, in some cases one parent needs to be present in the room for the child to learn gradually, while in others this is the worst thing you can do. It depends a lot on each and their behavior.
Setbacks happen
“Some parents panic when the baby gets sick or their teeth start to be born,” Kim says. Spoiling him for a few nights because of this won’t throw all the work in the trash – but don’t forget to get back to the routine as soon as he’s better. Remember that he has proven that he can follow the habit before, so you can come back quietly.
Full-bellied
Did you know that having regular meals help at bedtime? A baby that feeds well during the day will give you the certainty that he can sleep at night without having to breastfeed or have a bottle. If you still breastfeed, keep an eye out to differentiate when your child starts making your pacifier breast and look for alternatives.
Nap is key
Day time sleep leads to better night sleep. A tired child often can’t sleep right – this may seem strange, but she can feel overstimulated, causing her to cry instead of sleeping. Write it down there: babies under 6 months need 4 to 5 naps a day, while older people need 2 to 3. Remember that quiet baby and with sleep up to date is synonymous with quiet and happy mother too!
In practice
Schedule yourself to start your baby’s sleep training. Ensure at least three weeks of normal routine without major changes in everyday life.
Baby Sleep: Myths and Truths
If you don’t know where to start, talk to the pediatrician and friends, and resort to books and reports. Learn about some myths and truths about the children’s sleep below:
1. IT’S NOT GOOD TO SLEEP WITH FULL BELLY: TRUTH
It is inadvisable to put the child to sleep right after breastfeeding enough or eating solid foods. The weight of food can cause malaise. Not to mention there’s a risk of the baby regurging the milk and snagging it. The ideal is to offer dinner about two hours before bedtime. At night, the meal should be composed of easy-to-digest foods such as soups, lean meats (which are sources of protein), vegetables and boiled vegetables. Before bed, the child can take milk, but without extrapolating the volume to which he is accustomed. It is also worth reinforcing that when the baby burp, it decreases the risk of regurgitate during sleep. For the same reason, he must breastfeed with his head elevated to the body (with a slope of 30 to 45 degrees), and not fully lying down.
2. EVERY BABY LEARNS TO SLEEP ALONE: MYTH
Your child may have never demonstrated any kind of difficulty when going to bed, but this behavior is an exception. Only 10% of babies develop the ability to fall asleep on their own, employing resources such as swinging, holding a pan or sucking their finger. The others have to be taught. In the first three months, the baby repeats several cycles of breastfeeding and sleep. So it’s no use trying to get him to sleep all night at this stage. That’s all the more reason to focus efforts from the fifth month, with the creation of a routine.
3. TO SLEEP WELL, YOU NEED TO HAVE ROUTINE: TRUTH
The child needs, in fact, an established routine to get a good night’s sleep. Recent research from the University of Saint Joseph (USA) confirms this need. Forty-four families were studied, with children from 7 months to 3 years. The results showed that the simple fact that the child go to bed at the same time every night improves the continuity of night sleep and, consequently, contributes to the good mood of mothers. But this regularity is only possible from the fifth month, when the baby already produces melatonin – a hormone that induces drowsiness, signaling the body the moment of sleep. That’s where a sleep ritual should be established, repeating it every night, before putting the child to bed. Simple attitudes are able to signal to the baby that the time is coming to slow down: the room should be darkened and visual and sound stimuli also need to decrease. This may include a relaxing bath, a massage, diaper change, feeding and lap to burp. Then it’s worth putting the child in the crib and singing a song, telling a story or just talking. For older children, the routine is similar. Before falling asleep, parents can read a book, give a good night kiss and leave the room, so that the child falls asleep as independently as possible.
4. ALL RIGHT TO DOZE OFF IN CAR OR MUSICAL CAR SEAT: TRUTH
Yes, if it’s for brief naps. However, to sleep at night, it is important to be in the crib, whose mattress provides the ideal conditions for rest. But, attention! A survey by Children’s Hospital Medical Center (USA) warns of a worrying threat: the incorrect use of the automotive car seat outside the car is responsible for infant deaths from asphyxiation, as the child can curl up in the belt. So keep up constant surveillance.
5. THE CHILD WILL SLEEP ALL NIGHT IF HE DOES NOT TAKE ANY NAPS THROUGHOUT THE DAY: MYTH
The newborn can sleep around 16 to 19 hours a day, distributed equally between day and night. Over the months, sleep is concentrated at night and gradually decreases during the day. Naps usually last up to 3 or 4 years, but vary from one child to another.
6. IF THE BABY IS ACCUSTOMED TO FALL ASLEEP IN THE LAP, IT WILL BE DIFFICULT TO SLEEP ALONE IN THE CRADLE AFTER: TRUTH
If parents always pack their child in their arms, they’re teaching that’s how you fall asleep, and believe me, he’ll assimilate that information. When you wake up in the middle of the night, it’s possible you’ll cry and be scared not to recognize where you are. To avoid troubled nights, the ideal is that, from the beginning, parents let the child sleep in their own crib. There is no better place than the mother’s lap, which gives warmth, affection, protection. But it doesn’t offer the best position for sleep. Not to mention that the mother is unable to do her routine activities. It is advisable that, after breastfeeding, the baby burps still in the lap. Then just wait a few minutes for the milk to settle in the stomach and fix it in the crib, still awake.
7. NO PROBLEM CATCHING IN SLEEP WATCHING TV: MYTH
Falling asleep in front of television – and other screens, such as tablets and computers – is not beneficial at all. When the child watches a cartoon or a very hectic film before bedtime, she gets excited and the relaxation needed for sleep is compromised. The recommendation is to avoid the screens an hour before going to bed. A study by Harvard University (USA), with more than 1,800 children aged 6 to 8, found that there is an association between more hours in front of TV and reduced sleep time. It was also concluded that the presence of a TV in the room decreases rest by up to 30 minutes.
8. SOFT MUSIC, IN LOW VOLUME, HELPS TO CATCH SLEEP: TRUTH
Soft songs, such as classic ones, can contribute to relaxation if they are played at low volume. But they should be turned off as soon as the child sleeps. Some doctors, however, do not consider it necessary to resort to this type of artifice. Stay at the family’s choice.
9. CHILD MAY HAVE INSOMNIA: TRUTH
In childhood, the problem is rarer than in adults and usually has behavioral origin. For example, the child who throws tantrums to lie down, does not want to separate himself from the parents, cries, says that he is hungry or has a ghost under the bed, is looking for a way to postpone bedtime. A recent survey by the Norwegian University of Science and Technology (Norway), involving 1,000 children up to 6 years old, also revealed an association between insomnia and mental health problems such as anxiety, depression and ADHD.
10. NEWBORN IS COMMON TO CHANGE THE DAY BY NIGHT: TRUTH
This confusion is common in the first three months, when he still doesn’t realize the difference between day and night. At 6 months, sleep should already be concentrated in the night. To prevent the exchange from happening, it does not cost to reinforce that parents need to establish rules and routine, with regular bedtime.
11. DISEASE DOES NOT AFFECT SLEEP: MYTH
There are diseases that can interfere with rest, especially neurological ones. Epilepsy and cerebral palsy are some examples. Problems such as asthma, rhinitis and sleep apnea (the cause of which is usually large tonsils) are equally harmful. When you notice that your child has difficulty breathing at night, look for the pediatrician.
12. CAFFEINE TAKES SLEEP: TRUTH
Caffeine is a stimulant that should be avoided in the infant diet, especially at night. The recommended one is to present coffee only after 2 years, and always mixed with milk. Attention: the substance is also present in black and matte teas, cola-based soft drinks and chocolates. If it’s impossible to escape these items, you’d rather give it to your child by the afternoon, never at night.
13. CHILD WHO DOES NOT SLEEP ENOUGH GETS AGITATED: TRUTH
Adults often feel tired, but children can get even more excited. Lack of sleep leads to changes in memory and behavior. So no letting your son go to bed too late.
14. BRAIN RESTS WHEN SLEEPING: MYTH
He remains as active as in the wake. The difference is that it plays different functions, such as the release of growth hormone.
15. CHILD MAY HAVE SLEEPWALKING: TRUTH
Walking around the house during sleep is more frequent than you might think and has a strong hereditary component. According to a recent study conducted by the University of Montreal (Canada), 47% of children who have a country with a history of sleepwalking have the change. When both parents were sleepwalking, the occurrence rises to 61%. In the group in which they never had sleepwalking, the prevalence is only 22% in children. Care for children with the disorder is to prevent them from getting hurt at night. Placing network or grid in windows and locking the doors are essential security measures. In general, episodes become less frequent as they pass the years as the nervous system matures.
16. THE HIGHER THE AGE, THE LESS HOURS OF SLEEP ARE REQUIRED: TRUTH
The newborn can sleep up to 19 hours a day, as it grows, this time decreases. The American organization National Sleep Foundation released an updated table with the appropriate amount of rest time for each age group. Check out, taking into account that individual characteristics can lead to small variations:
AGE HOURS OF SLEEP
0 to 3 months – 11 to 19 hours
4 to 11 months – 10 to 18 hours
1 to 2 years – 9 to 16 hours
3 to 5 years – 8 to 14 hours
6 to 13 years – 7 to 12 hours
17. NIGHT TERROR MEANS THE SAME AS NIGHTMARE: MYTH
Night terror is a wake-up disorder: usually, the child sits in bed in the middle of the night, screams, cries, pronounces no nexus phrases, and heartbeats and breathing accelerate. During the episode, the child is not conscious and remembers nothing when waking up. About 3% of children present the condition, being more frequent between 5 and 7 years.
18. CHILD WHO GETS TIRED DURING THE DAY SLEEPS BETTER AT NIGHT: MYTH
Not always. Sometimes a large number of activities leave the child so excited that she may have difficulty relaxing. Or it may be until you sleep early, due to tiredness, but wake up in the middle of the morning.
19. TOTAL SILENCE IS NEEDED WHILE BABY SLEEPS: MYTH
All the room is to be calm. “Parents should not watch a high-volume action movie, for example, but they can close the door of the child’s room and watch TV in the room or chat at moderate volume.”
20. THE INTAKE OF LIQUIDS BEFORE BEDTIME AT DEFRALDE SHOULD BE REDUCED: TRUTH
Talk to the pediatrician and establish how to proceed with the feedings. But in general, the recommendation is to decrease fluid intake before bedtime, aiming to avoid nocturnal pee. Don’t forget to take your child to the bathroom before putting him to bed and, just at the beginning, every two hours. Finally, congratulate him on the conquest, every time he spends the night without any escape.
21. THOSE WHO DO NOT SLEEP ENOUGH HAVE MORE DIFFICULTIES IN SCHOOL: TRUTH
School performance is often impaired by the sleepy nights. Research from sapienza University of Rome (Italy) concluded that the amount and quality of sleep are closely related to learning capacity. Another Finnish study from the University of Helsinki, with 60 children aged 6 to 13, also revealed that sleep deprivation affects memory in school activities. This is another reason for you to understand the importance of the routine and not to leave the child awake late. If your child has trouble getting up in the morning to go to school, try putting him to sleep early. So he will feel more willing the next day to attend classes.
22. IT IS NORMAL TO GRIND TEETH: MYTH
If the child squeezes his jaw while sleeping, he is likely to have bruxism. Its most common consequence is the wear of the teeth, but there may also be noises, muscle aches, limitation of mouth opening and ringing in the ear. A survey by the University of São Paulo (USP) evaluated 475 children aged 4 to 5 years and showed that 47.4% of them had the problem. It is related to the habits of biting nails, biting lips, chewing gum and breathing through the mouth. Children with restless sleep and frequent headache also have more episodes. The most common treatment is the use of specific sleeping plates, which reduce contact between teeth.
23. BABY DOES NOT DREAM: MYTH
In adults, dreams occur in the so-called REM Sleep, characterized by rapid eye movements. As children’s sleep contemplates this stage from birth, they are believed to also dream. The content would be in accordance with information that captures the environment. That is, initially, the baby would dream of colors, then, with faces of family members, and so on.
24. LIGHT LIT HINDERS SLEEP: TRUTH
Luminosity inhibits the secretion of melatonin, a hormone that induces and deepens rest. And as growth hormone (GH) is released during deep sleep, this manufacture is also impaired. So darken the environment. If the child is afraid of dark, use a blue outlet lamp, the only type of light that causes drowsiness.
25. AFTER THE FIRST MONTH, IT IS NOT NECESSARY TO WAKE UP A BABY WHO SLEEPS ALL NIGHT: TRUTH
During the first month, it is not appropriate for him to stay more than six hours without feeding. So he needs to be awakened when he’s giving this break. After this period, it is no longer necessary to awaken it. Just make sure he’s gaining weight properly and developing well. Diseases such as hypothyroidism are very rare, which lead the baby to sleep excessively. But if there’s this suspicion, talk to the pediatrician.
26. IF THE CHILD DOES NOT APPEAR TIRED, SHE DOES NOT NEED TO TAKE A NAP DURING THE DAY: TRUTH
Up to 6 months, nap is clearly beneficial, but after that, it is not mandatory and parents can let it happen naturally. The ideal, he said, is to be flexible without imposing the nap in the afternoon if your child does not show signs that he needs it. This varies from one child to another.
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